Alice Kaufman

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When her book on begonias gets rejected by her publisher, the prim, proper, and all-too virginal Authoress decides to write “a book on sex.” However, because she’s led “a sheltered life,” our tall, long-legged, and long-nosed Authoress sets out to learn all she can on the subject, starting with herself. She sticks some fingers up her unused treasure chest, giggles, and groans, “I am sexual! I can do anything I wanna do!” And do she does.