Matthew Hays

We meet Rosemary lying on the floor of her house, sobbing. Heartbroken. The doorbell rings. It's a Pizza Delivery Guy. Rosemary can't stop crying. She wants love, but it never works out. Fortunately for Rosemary, this Pizza Delivery Guy has the answer: forget about love and focus on wild random sex for once in her life. We cut to a fun slut-training montage where Pizza Delivery Guy teaches Rosemary his skanky ways and Rosemary learns to sexually liberate herself. Rosemary thinks she's mastered slut life, but her new skills are put to the test when she meets Ned.

What if internet apps were people?