Tuva Hølmebakk

Six ideas for movies that will never be made.

The dorkiest thing in the world, according to feminist poet Sigrid, is the movie cliche of the young woman who in the morning dons her male lover's shirt, looking adorably "indie cute". But when she begins a relationship with Kåre Tryvle, she has difficulties living up to her ideals. Meanwhile, pregnant performance artist Trine is planning to give birth in a cage, dressed up as Marie Antoinette, on camera, and factory worker Astrid is looking for the son she had adopted away.

A nurse gets into a dispute at work because she switches to speaking English when she gets nervous. A translator compromises her integrity when persuaded to translate a book she doesn't believe in. An elderly woman and her daughter are humiliated when offered a present of one million kroner from a relative. A warm and nuanced film about people who all mean well, but end up hurting one another.

The day Clinton visited Norway, my girlfriend broke up with me.

On Christmas Eve while her mother obsesses about stuffing the turkey, Annie tells her family she is a lesbian.