Beware the White Monster

Venerable newscaster Norm Archer reports the latest news in politics, health, culture and entertainment - such as an automotive recall of decapitation-inducing "Neckbelts" and a study finding that "depression hits losers hardest". This compilation of bogus news stories, celebrity profiles, movie trailers and skits come courtesy of the ace satirists at The Onion.

Bumbling lieutenant Frank Drebin is out to foil the big boys in the energy industry, who intend to suppress technology that will put them out of business.

In an English village, a reporter and a mechanic listen to a ratcatcher explain his clever plan to outwit his prey.

In a blue-collar American town, a group of teens bands together to form the Dandies, a gang of gunslingers led by Dick Dandelion. Following a code of strict pacifism at odds with the fact that they all carry guns, the group eventually lets in Sebastian, the grandson of Dick's childhood nanny, Clarabelle, who fears the other gangs in the area. Dick and company try to protect Clarabelle, but events transpire that push the gang past posturing.

Although Brad has a satisfying career, a sweet wife and a comfortable life in suburban Sacramento, things aren't quite what he imagined during his college glory days. When he accompanies his musical prodigy son on a university tour, he can't help comparing his life with those of his four best college friends who seemingly have more wealthy and glamorous lives. But when circumstances force him to reconnect with his former friends, Brad begins to question whether he has really failed or if their lives are actually more flawed than they appear.

In a totalitarian future society, a man whose daily work is rewriting history tries to rebel by falling in love.

In a seemingly perfect community, without war, pain, suffering, differences or choice, a young boy is chosen to learn from an elderly man about the true pain and pleasure of the "real" world.

Based on the true story of a black girl who was born to two white Afrikaner parents in South Africa during the apartheid era.

A series of eerie events thrusts an unlikely trio onto the trail of a nefarious government conspiracy lurking directly beneath their neighborhood.

Encouraged by his girlfriend Ellie, Sebastian and his Italian immigrant father, Salvo, spend the 4th of July weekend with her wealthy and exceedingly eccentric family. The gathering soon develops into a culture clash, allowing father and son to discover the true meaning of family.

A campus culture war between Blacks and whites at a predominantly white Ivy League college comes to a head when the staff of a satirical magazine stages an offensive Halloween party.

A jazz musician seeks refuge from a lynch mob on a remote island, where he meets a hostile game warden and the young object of his attentions.