Any Old Port!

Oliver's in trouble with his wife after missing a payment on their furniture, having given the money to Stanley, who used it instead to pay Mrs. Hardy for his room and board. At Stan's suggestion Ollie then withdraws the couple's savings from the bank to pay for the furniture and inadvertently pays virtually the whole amount at an auction for a grandfather clock which is soon crushed under a passing truck. Mrs Hardy then unintentionally causes serious injuries to Ollie requiring him to be rushed to hospital for a blood transfusion. The doctor conscripts Stan to be the unwilling blood donor. Problems occur with the transfusion and when Stan and Ollie leave the hospital they appear to have morphed into each other.

Novice policemen Stan and Ollie bungle a burglary investigation.

Stan and Ollie try to hide their pet dog Laughing Gravy from their exasperated, mean tempered landlord, who has a "No Pets" policy.

Although they are successful fishmongers, Stan convinces Ollie that they should become fishermen too, but making a boat seaworthy isn't an easy task.

Stan and Ollie are greeting card salesmen who agree to help a woman put a spark in her loveless marriage by making her husband jealous.

Street musicians Stan and Ollie have no success earning money in the dead of winter in a bad neighborhood. Their instruments are destroyed in an argument with a woman, but their luck seems to turn when Stan finds a wallet.

On the morning of his wedding to oil baron Peter Cucumber's daughter, Ollie receives a jigsaw puzzle from Stan as a wedding gift. The boys soon become absorbed in the puzzle. A taxi driver, butler, policeman and messenger boy join in as well.

During the Florida land boom, the Marx Brothers run a hotel, auction off some land and thwart a jewel robbery.

Stan and Ollie join the French Foreign Legion after Ollie's sweetheart rejects him.

Stuck in a traffic jam, Dante and Randal discuss the prospect of a flying car.

Donald has to get up early, but everything seems to be working to keep him awake. His loudly ticking alarm clock resists several attempts to quiet it. Donald ultimately swallows it; the glow-in-the-dark dial can be seen through his feathers. Then his folding bed folds up on him. Springs start popping out of it; Donald builds an elaborate framework to hold it down. Finally, enough of the clock reassembles itself to sound the alarm and night is over.

Walking along with his bulldog, Charlie finds a "good luck" horseshoe just as he passes a training camp advertising for a boxing partner "who can take a beating." After watching others lose, Charlie puts the horseshoe in his glove and wins. The trainer prepares Charlie to fight the world champion. A gambler wants Charlie to throw the fight. He and the trainer's daughter fall in love.